I wrote these top ten things you will see next year on my phone before a cup of tea.
1. One more… There is always one more.
2. Two kinds of people. Those who can count and those who cannot. (Sorry. My son thinks this is funny).
3. Three people preaching religion, preaching science, preaching anti-religion. At least two of these people will think you’re a moron. You’re unable to win this one. Move on.
4. Four photo complaints of kids, pets, food, and selfies on your $500 phone that you pay $10,000 per decade to use.
5. Five studies to support that the other study found support in a different way but is marketed to be unsupported in this more complex and confusing way.
6. Six people complaining about the misuse of “their” and “they’re” because they’re unable to understand an IQ of 140 moves and processes faster and quicker. That’s OK, so is 99% of the rest of the world. (Remember folks, a high IQ is a special need and can lead to depression and other things if ignored so please be kind to those who don’t fit your mold). Next up…
7. Seven questions to find out which wizard you are for advertising companies. This is more fun than the warranty cards that come with the new TV you got for Christmas.
PS: I’m Gandalf.
8. Eight reasons your ______ sucks.
9. Nine ways to make your ______ perfect.
Just kidding. See number eight.
10. Top Ten ways to do something you’re never going to do.
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